From TV.com: Lily gets asked to be in a play. Robin discovers the source of a lot of Ted's stuff and Ted discovers the source of Robin's dogs. They have a fight and ask the rest of the gang to rule on the matter.
Ted: Oh my god, Van Helsing is on. Remember when we went to see it? We sat in the back row...
Robin: I've never seen Van Helsing.
Ted: Oh that's right, I saw it with my sister.
Robin: My boss just got back from Maui, he said it was really romantic.
Ted: Oh, it's so romantic.
Robin: When were you in Maui?
Ted: I went... with... Robin (joining in): my sister!
Robin: Why do you always say that?
Lily: Hot off the presses!
Barney: I don't take flyers.
Marshall: You took one two seconds before you walked in here!
Barney: That's different, it was for a strip club. Two bucks off wings! How much is your flyer gonna save me on wings?
Ted: Really? You can't look at a pillow without seeing my ex girlfriend? A pillow!?
Robin: Yes, Ted, the fact that you still have that pillow is creepy and gross!
Ted: You're creepy and gross!
Robin: Your mom is creepy and gross!
Lily: Order! Order!
Barney: I side with Robin. Ted, your place is too cluttered. It's like you're living in a Bennigan's.
Ted, 2023 (Narration): New York is famous for its theatre. But there's many different levels. There's Broadway, off-Broadway, off-off Broadway, homeless people screaming in the park, and below that, the play Aunt Lily was in.
Actor 1: I am rage!
Actor 2: I am greed!
Lily: I am rage - ENVY!
Lily: If you were in a play, I'd sit through the whole thing and I'd compliment you on it afterward.
Barney: Oh really, you would?
Lily: Yes!
Barney: Bad move, Aldrin. Bad move.
Robin: Oh my God, you've been robbed!
Ted: Nope.
Robin (pauses): All that stuff was from old girlfriends? Don't you buy anything for yourself?
Ted: What can I say? Papa gets swag.
Lily: He's really having trouble dealing with this, huh?
Robin: Yeah, he really is. It's got me thinking maybe I should get rid of my dogs. Might be time to send them to the farm.
Lily: You're going to kill your dogs?!
Robin: No! there really is a farm! My aunt has a farm upstate.
Robin: My aunt is awfully lonely up there, it's just her and her lover Betty.
Lily: Oh that's perfect, they love dogs!
Robin: "They," what do you mean by "they?"
Lily: Uh... people upstate - Oh look it's starting! Shh!
Barney: Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
Ted 2023 (Narration): That was the first 40 minutes of Barney's show. Then we endured about 20 minutes of this.
[Barney shoots Lily with a water gun]
Barney: I have to go refill. I'll be back in a moment - play's not over!
Marshall: I never get picked for audience participation.
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2 comments:
hey interesting quotes bro i also have some of the quotes from the show you can view it at watch how i met your mother.
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